J.R.'s Family Bar-B-Q

For a week that has been so personally rewarding for the Ross family with the successful opening of J.R.’s Family Bar-B-Q Restaurant on Wednesday, spending Saturday traveling from Norman to Daytona Beach, Florida and back, was a unique way to end the week. “Unique” probably isn’t the word I’m looking for. How about “heartbreaking”? Knowing I had to get up at 3:30 a.m. to make a 6 a.m. departure meant little or no sleep Friday night. Even with two alarms set, it is hard for me to rest knowing that I could not miss the flight from OKC to Atlanta connecting into Daytona. As it was, I landed in Daytona at 12:20 p.m. and the services for Nancy and Daniel started at 1 p.m. I made it to the church with maybe 10 minutes to spare. But I did make it. It was the least I could do to show my respect for two people for which I cared a great deal. The media was strategically hovering outside the church to where one could not enter the facility under the normal, covered walkway during the heavy rain without walking by the reporters, who I realize have a job to do. They had questions with the first being something along the lines of “what about the steroid issue?” It wasn’t “what are your memories of Nancy and Daniel?” or “Is there anything you would like to say to the families?” It was the tired, “steroid” question. This entire tragedy is about much more than alleged steroid abuse, especially on this day that I will carry with me for the rest of my days. I guess it is another “one of those days” that can join the others already filed away, that I will never forget. Sitting on the Delta plane here’s what I was thinking on the way from Oklahoma to Florida. I am a grandfather of two beautiful, healthy granddaughters. I love those two babies with all my heart and soul. I mentally found myself in the shoes of Nancy’s folks. Not only did they lose their daughter but they also lost, as I understand it, their ONLY grandchild. Their ONLY grandchild. I can’t even fathom how I would handle such a tragedy. If you are reading this and have young children, how would you handle burying them? Perhaps some of you have unfortunately had to endure this challenge in your life. If so, you have my most sincere condolences. Parents are not supposed to bury their own children as has been said over time and memorial. But parents burying a grandchild at the same is beyond description. The service was reserved and classy. I loved the music. The structure of the service allowed for ample opportunities for one to reflect on the lives of Nancy and Daniel. Of course, Chris, too, crossed my mind during the service. How could he not? Daniel’s full name is Daniel Christopher Benoit and I read the little guy’s name over and over during the service. I thought of so many memories of the Benoit family especially at Wrestlemanias which has a “family reunion” feel for many of us who don’t see the talents’ spouses and their kids but a handful of times per year. I have literally seen Daniel grow up at Wrestlemania as Nancy would have the apple of her eye dressed to the “nines” in either a little tuxedo or a handsome suit. Indeed, Mom Nancy made her little boy a sharp dressed man. I loved it when they danced together! I can still close my eyes and hear the music and see their smiles. Today, I needed to see those smiles. Today I needed to feel those good memories. Hopefully today, Nancy’s family and many friends can start to “officially” heal. It’s time for all of us to heal as best we can and to attempt to move forward. Watching Nancy’s Mom, Dad and Sister leave the service was incredibly touching. I should be more eloquent but writing this isn’t easy. Saturday afternoon in Daytona, the media wanted to talk to me about “drugs” and the ills, perceived and real, of the wrestling business. Today was not the time. Today was a time of remembrance for the loved ones that have been lost and for paying our respect to a devastated family. The wrestling business, like our lives, is far from perfect and many areas of it need to be addressed and improved upon. Perhaps this mission should be approached as if tomorrow was our first day on the job and we have the chance to start fresh and make things better for everyone who wants to play by the rules and to do the right things so the business will continue to thrive long after guys like me are nothing more than a fleeting memory of bygone days. But Saturday, July 14 wasn’t about the business. It was about paying respect to a grieving family who need all the courage they can muster and all the prayers they can receive. Today. Please remember these folks in your prayers. Tomorrow will be here soon enough. J.R.